The Speaking Of "Dismal Theories" Rant (The Pope Spews Some X'mas Hate)

Ok, look, it's the holiday season and I really don't have the time, nor the inclination, to rant right now; however, I've sadly been left with no other choice.

Believe me, I was just trying to get into the holiday spirit yesterday when, out of nowhere, I got blindsided by none other than the Holy Pontiff; and he simply left me with no other option but to stand up to his bigotry, hatred and illogical ravings. Hey, somebody's got to do it, right?

What I'm talking about here is the Pope's latest homophobic rant against gays, his disgust at the idea of them being treated as equal human beings, and his rejection of the "dismal theories" of gay marriage. He actually had the nerve to go on and lecture about how gay marriage takes away from men and women's innate sexual identity. This from a guy leading a worldwide group of celibates. He's telling us about men and women's innate sexual identity?! He's got to be kidding, right? He wants us to believe that lifelong celibacy doesn't strip men and women of their innate sexual identity?! What's with this guy?

Hey, Benedict, you want to fight for some real justice for humanity? How about going after all those pedophile priests your church shuffled from one town to another as a matter of policy, decade after decade - no, make that century after century - while untold numbers of children suffered in silence. The issue was only confronted once the courts got involved in places like America and Ireland. And, undoubtedly, the same sick protection of the most guilty is still going on in most corners of the world, in places where the media is more "respectful" of the Church and the people are much more frightened to speak up.

So, take a look at your own morally bankrupt institution before you spread your hate outwards, buddy, and forget about condemning those who just want to live together in a loving committed relationship. There must be something more important for you to spend your energy on than this. There's just got to be.

Speaking of "dismal", illogical theories, who exactly was it who deemed this Pope guy to be closer than anybody else to God anyway? Oh yeah, it was him and his own institution. Which, logically speaking, is right up there with "Jesus loves me yes I know, for the Bible tells me so". I remember that even as a young kid that made absolutely no logical sense. And, if you ask me, teaching kids illogical thinking from the very earliest ages really should be called child abuse, but that's a whole other rant.

For those of you crying out "Please, no more rants so close to X'mas", I can only say "Don't blame me, blame that Pope guy". I mean, somebody's got to speak up when such pathetically ridiculous and outright hypocritical idiocy is being spewed, right? And the fact that it's actually quite comical (having some old celibate guy lecturing the world on other people's innate sexual identity) in no way lessens the need to respond... though it does make it somewhat more fun.

MERRY X'MAS!!

Mike Cowie (Oredakedo)
Saturday, December 23rd, 2006

 

For further reading on Benny The Pontificator check this out: Touching The Untouchables #7: The Pope

 

If you liked this piece you might enjoy this one as well: What If: The Sex and Hunger Rant

 

And this one too: Touching The Untouchables #5: Pedophile God

 

And this one: The Don't Thank God For The Lunacy of The Runaway Ego Rant

 

And for a good laugh you should definitely check this out: Another Hilarious Stephen Colbert Clip: "Better Know a Lobby - Atheism"

 

For more on Religion click here: Religion

  

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