Pathetically Prudish People

The Pope's Annual X'mas Message of Hate

Benny The Pontificator Strikes Again

That buffoon Benedict is at it once again, lashing out at gays in yet another hate-filled speech and declaring that civilization must be saved from the evil, destructive influence of homosexuality (read more here: Pope attacks blurring of gender, and here: Gay groups angry at Pope remarks).

Now that's a Christmas message we can all get behind, isn't it? A message of peace, love and joy. Yet another classic in a long line of greats, such as the one about the corrosive influence of premarital sex on society; the one concerning the evils of birth control, particularly condoms (even in AIDS-ravaged places such as sub-Saharan Africa); and let's not forget that oldie-but-goodie: the need to conquer and convert all heathens and infidels.

Touching The Untouchables #7: The Pope

Did you hear the latest one by that Pope guy? You must have heard how, earlier this week, he decided to once again demonstrate his prowess at pomposity with his latest message to the world. And as far as pathetically pompous pontifications go, this one was a definite keeper.

What If: The Sex and Hunger Rant

What if religion and, especially, hardcore religious types treated hunger (one of the essential human drives) the same way they treat sex (another of the essential human drives)? What if they were to be suffering from the same Obsession/Repulsion Disorder in relation to food as they are in relation to sex and human sexuality? Can you imagine it? I sure can:

You thought about a cheese sandwich outside of meal time? Say 10 Hail Marys.

She ate lunch outside of the prescribed and sanctified lunch hour, stone her to death!

Touching The Untouchables #5: Pedophile God

You've heard about Petty God, you've contemplated long and hard about Vengeful Angry Pissed-Off God, you've read in disbelief about that psycho Abraham and his willingness to murder his own son, and you've more than likely heard something about that Mohammed guy and his child bride. But what about Pedophile God, have you ever really considered Pedophile God?


The Speaking Of "Dismal Theories" Rant (The Pope Spews Some X'mas Hate)

Ok, look, it's the holiday season and I really don't have the time, nor the inclination, to rant right now; however, I've sadly been left with no other choice.

Believe me, I was just trying to get into the holiday spirit yesterday when, out of nowhere, I got blindsided by none other than the Holy Pontiff; and he simply left me with no other option but to stand up to his bigotry, hatred and illogical ravings. Hey, somebody's got to do it, right?

The Vatican Specialists Mini-Rant

The Vatican has once again come out this week - with a full "report" no less - condemning gay marriage as "the greatest threat to the family" the world has ever seen. Or some such crap. Let's just ignore for the moment the ridiculousness of the whole idea of 2 gay people wanting to share their lives together somehow being a threat to The Family. What I really want to ask is this: Isn't the idea of a bunch of never-married celibate men lecturing the world about marriage more than just a bit ludicrous?

The Wise Men of Kashmir Rant

Get this: One of the rebel groups, the Harkat-ul Jehad-e-Islami, fighting the Indian army in Kashmir made a number of threats over the past year that are sure to make life much more wonderful, happy and free for all the Kashmiri people.

Here are some of their threats/demands/orders to the local population:

- Any women who do not stop working for the government will be immediately killed.

- No girls should attend school.

The Disgusting Nipple Rant

I've spent the past week reading and hearing all about the huge "scandal" involving Janet Jackson's breast/tit/boob making its big surprise appearance at the Superbowl Halftime Show. Supposedly this one breast, this one tit, this one boob, has caused "outrage", "shock", "horror" and "disgust" in some quarters in America. My only question is this: Who are these people? What kind of people are "outraged" at the sight of a breast? Surprised, yes. Stimulated, perhaps. But how could anyone actually be upset, disturbed or outraged by one single human breast?

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